Camel Toe Annie: Insert A Caption

Via comes the following picture that could turn a straight man gay:

Wrong Hole!

Wrong Hole! (via

I haven’t been this horrified by a picture since the before and after pictures of Stephanie Tanner.


Not So Fast “HERO”

Michael Phelps is not human. In fact he is a fish. Breaking news out of China has determined that Phelps’ has had sex with 412312 females and 3 males. How’d the males get involved? Don’t ask.

If you are a regular contributor to the fair pole, and if you are not, what the fuck is wrong with you, Guyswithadream has a huge man crush on Phelps. Hey who wouldn’t right? Guy is a freak, but I’m going to play devils advocate here which always leads to great fun.


you touch?

you touch?


Do you care that he won 8 gold medals? Really do you care? I am happy for him sure, but I would 100 percent rather “The Redeem Team” (btw that slogan sounds like something Home Depot would pitch during a backyard home makeover sale) win the Gold over Phelps’ 8 medals.

I just don’t really care. Olympics are so 1500. We get all involved for two weeks and then one week later we could care less. If I saw Michael Phelps at a bar in December I would be excited, but it would last all of three minutes.

It’s like when McDonalds brings back the McRib. Sure he is getting some mad tail, but I think I would much rather be lets say Evan Langoria of the Tampa Bay Rays.

Guy is 23, good lucking, playing in Florida totally away from the press, and probably bangs a new Florida hottie every day. No one has to know. No one has to care. Everyone gets to be happy. Phelps can go on endorsing and he will make his cash-Visa, Speedo, Omega, and for some odd reason Rosetta Stone speech-and don’t even fucking tell me he used it to learn Chinese…I mean how much could he have possibly made for that?

Do they have money for ads? 3-4 Susan B Anthony’s is my call. So Micheal Phelps your life is good ya, but trust me guys, there are plenty of dudes I’d rather be. Yes Michel Phelps is one of them…ahhh sad


her? no sex, just head

her? no sex, just head

Olympics…Still More Confusing than Women

I don’t get it. I am just going to come out swinging and ask you America why we care about the Olympics. I am not going to lie, I have watched a ton, got into them too, but still am confused why we care so much about some sport just created and so little about one’s that “matter”.

We get caught up in watching Misty May because she’s a hottie and gymnastics because we still love that coach who mumbles through English and love the passion, but shouldn’t this be a time when all sports really should matter?

We invented basketball so we want to win Gold and demolish everyone, but didn’t we create baseball also? Did you even know we had a team? I would have lied if I said I was sure we did.

Badminton and fencing get more love than baseball. And another sport that gets very little love? Soccer. Shouldn’t this be it Europe? Didn’t you all love the Euro Cup and obviously the world cup? But no one cares. No one could care less.

Roger Federer made it seem like a chore he even had to play. He’d much rather win Wimbledon than win a gold medal for his country!!! Here’s the catch. I don’t care either. I’d rather win my fantasy football league than USA win any medals. I’m thrilled three ladies swept the fencing competition.

No I’m not. How the fuck do you even get into fencing? Dad must make over 500,000 a year and belong to a country club?  Shit man. How to fix the Olympics? Make them every 16 years and always have them in the Eastern Time zone so I can watch them live. Other than that, my angry rant is now over.

image broken? do u care?

image not coming in clear? do you care? Article I Wouldn’t Read if Somebody Stuck A Gun to My Head

My hat doesnt fit anymore

My hat doesn't fit anymore

“A year ago, Matt Murphy caught Barry Bonds’ record 756th homer. How has his life changed?”

-Jemele Hill

Weekend Box Office Wrap Up: 8/18/2008

What do you mean you people

What do you mean you people

1. Tropic Thunder – $26.0 Million

With all of the controversy about the use of the word “retarded”, I think the bigger issue was Jack Black’s complete inability to be funny.  As an aside, can you imagine how much ass Michael Phelps will get now?

2. The Dark Knight – $16.8 Million

Johnny Depp as the RiddlerPhilip Seymour Hoffman as the Penguin?  How about Rosie O’ Donnell as the overweight Robin?

3.  Star Wars: The Clone Wars – $15.5 Million

Shitty idea.  Looked like an awful movie. 

4.  Mirrors – $11.1 Million

This movie looked really scary in the same vein that the new season of Chuck looks really funny. 

5.  Pineapple Express– $10.0 Million

Really disappointing.  I laughed the hardest when the two asian men were sitting in a truck and they sub-titled in “I have to take a shit”.

Also, crazy to think this guy (Craig Robinson of the office) is an allegedmeth addict.

Blame It On the Rain

Milly Vanilli…I haven’t thought about them in a long time. In fact it has been weeks. As we know the entire earth and universe are Red Sox fans, hence the name Red Sox Nation.

We all know Red Sox Nation is a marketing creation probably created by George W. Bush, but this gem really made us chuckle. Jonathan Papelbon truly does remind us why white people don’t dance.

Manny Delcarmen illustrates to us what good dancing can look like. Wally the Green Monster reminds us what nightmares feel like. He kinda resembles Jack the Ripper from Last Action hero…yeah I went there…

Romeo & Juliet, Harry & Sally, and now Brandon & Rasheeda

Brandon Marshall


In a case of he said/she said, Broncos four-year veteran and ex-girlfriend Rasheeda Watley were engaged in a dispute in March 2008. Marshall, the man with a glowing track record of truth telling, initially said during the dispute:

“Initially, Marshall told arriving police the girlfriend’s ‘sisters attacked him with a knife, cutting his hand,’ according to a police report on the March 4 fight at his high-rise Atlanta condominium.”

Later however Marshall said:

“But, according to new documents obtained Thursday, when police asked who had the knife, “Marshall stated there was no knife and he had been cut on glass during the fight,” police wrote. It’s unclear how Marshall’s hand was cut on the glass, because when police returned to talk to him in the condo hallway, he had left.”

Not funny however, was the claim of Rasheeda, Brandon’s ex-girlfriend:

“She said they began arguing and Marshall allegedly ‘began to destroy the apartment, threw her on the bed, grasped her head with his hand, and began to slap her,’ according to the police report. Her sisters, Adilah Watley, 21, and Aliyah, 16, gave similar accounts of the alleged assault.”

But like every true American love story, this had a happy ending. Marshall said:

“‘Basically, what it was is I had just gotten into town and the relationship was basically over,’ said Marshall, who owns the Atlanta condo. ‘I told her it was time to end it now, and she didn’t like that. We’ve been dating off and on since the eighth grade, and she said, ‘I’m going to ruin you.’ The only thing I did was try to get out of the house.”‘

You can read the rest of the sordid tale below. However, I think the lesson we can learn here is with enough conviction, pride, and heart in yourself then the truth will prei’vegonecrosseyed